At the time of writing I have visited Dublin 18 times, mainly midweek lads trips (to avoid the “stag doo” crowd) and a few trips with the wife and other couples. The trips these days are quite a fine tuned affair, usually two nights, three days with a location always picked on the DART (Dublin Area Rapid Transit) for the main day, to have day time drink round a village on the Dublin coastline. We’ve done, Howth (a few times), Malahide, Dun Laoghaire (a few times), Bray, Dalkey and been up into the mountains a few  times.

Today’s trips are a far cry from the first lads trip we organised. There were three of us sharing a flat in Ilkley (Me (Gup, Dribbs and Woody Lad) West Yorkshire and we all paid money into a bills account on a monthly basis. We decided with the money left over we would we would book a trip on the lash. Of course we couldn’t go without Geordie Lad so he chipped in and we got it booked. This first lads trip was a three night four dayer arriving at lunchtime on Good Friday of 2001, good planning we thought as we wouldn’t have to take much time off work with the bank holidays. Little did we realise that Dublin was a dry city on “Good” Friday!

So here we were 4 young thrusters after a few pints and a good time, unfortunately for the first and last time we were staying in a hostel with no bar and the only drink you could get was as a resident of a hotel with (and this is the important bit) a bar. We tried a few hotels, trying to convince them we were residents. It went something like this “Right lads, I’ll try first, try to look inconspicuous”, “Good luck Gup”.. “Could we have 4 pints of Guinness, one with a drop of black (Dribbs the lightweight)”. “Sure have you got your room key?”, “We’ll leave now!”

Dribbs: “Right lads, leave it to me this time, I’m confident”, “We’re backing you pal!”. “Four pint of Guinness please, one with black we are in room 112.” Clever very clever from Dribbs, or so we thought. “Room 112 you say? We’ve only got 40 rooms!”.”We’ll leave!”

We found a snooker hall somewhere on the North side of Dublin and played half a frame until we were turfed out at 10pm as that’s what time it shut on Good Fridays!! So off we went back to the noisiest hostel in Dublin (I have blanked the name of it from memory) stone cold sober. Not a flying success our first night on the “p1ss” in Dublin.

we rose early on Saturday morning raring to go! After breakfast we were on the open top bus tour thinking it was great we could jump on and off as we pleased and the bus driver told jokes, Brilliant!! We were in the Guinness factory (you may pick up a pattern of my early trips) and at the bar looking over the skyline at 11am. What could go wrong starting at this time.

We were back in a sports bar at the bottom of the Temple bar area (I don’t recall the name but it has since changed hands a few times and used to do singles nights where you wore certain colour stickers if you wanted a poke or not) for the 1 O’clock kick, Man Utd v Coventry (funny what you remember). Dribbs had already decided he didn’t like Guinness so was on the Lager top (bitches brew as the barman informed us). As much as I loved this first ever lads trip we didn’t venture too far from the Temple Bar area, this approach would change greatly over the years.

About four or five pints in and the first realisation happened, this would be a ground breaking visit to the toilet and even now still takes up quite a lot of the conversation among the lads on tour. It was the realisation that when you drink Guinness you sh1t black and you sh1t frequently! A frequently asked question asked (with a straight face) “Your sh1t changed yet?”. “Aye, I’ve arrived!”. ” Good lad!”.

After a long old session on the Saturday, where Woody Lad dropped a pint off a fruit machine onto a stone floor, the glass remained in one piece and bounced back up emptying said pint all over Woodies face and jumper, sympathetic we were not. Geordie Lad ripped his shirt bought especially for the trip as an army role went wrong crossing a road. We were in the Auld Dubliner in the heart of Temple bar listening to a singer/guitarist playing various irish and other sing along classics (I remember a particularly enthusiastic David Gray ‘Sail Away’ from the lads, funny what you remember). Anyway 10.30pm was fast approaching and even on a bank holiday weekend where we come from last orders was always 10.30pm! Dribbs went to the bar doubled up on the pints of Guinness for the lads and treated homself to 4 watermelon Bacardi breezers (yes you read that correctly, watermelon Barcardi Breezers). As w were  trying to juggle the copious amounts of drinks the barman wandered round collecting glasses. To dribbs “What aboutcha lads, what the feck are you doing juggling four bottles?” Dribbs “well its 10.25 get em in before last orders pal!” Barman “You fecking eeejit, we stop serving when you’ve had enough!” dribbs “Oh right, bollocks!” The barman then proceeded to nudge the locals and his colleagues point and snigger in Dribbs direction.

We left the Auld Dubliner following a particularly boisterous version of “Hey Jude” us singing the “Roy Keane” version and four lovely lasses from Glasgow singing the “Celtic” version. The lasses promised to get us in a nightclub if we went in with them, we didn’t need at nightclub at this point, but as at the time we were all single lads we thought in for a penny….(that wasn’t their names). Anyway it was my round in the club and as the lads had, had two solid days on the black stuff the request was anything but. The look on the lads faces when i came back with a cheeky grin and four pints of Guinness! we didn’t last much longer!

So as soon as we had arrived it was tome to leave, well actually day 1 dragged like anything! I was hooked but decided that never again would i go without doing a bot of research first, the start of a tradition was beginning.